If You Can't Stand the Heat, Get a Fan!
by Kyuusaisha Bleeding
Summary: Ratha pointless, but if you like fans, Naruto, and humour, this is the story for you. Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura are trying to cool down on a hot day, but nothing is working. They're in luck when the coolest person in Konohagakure walks by...


Kyuusaisha Bleeding: Here's another one of those stupidily random Naruto things. It probably sucks, but I don't care.

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Today, on this sunny afternoon, Team 7 had the day off. It was rather a lucky thing that Sasuke, Naruto, and Sakura didn't have to do any work, because the unclouded, summer sun was making the day viciously scorching. Even though the three genin were sitting under the biggest tree in the village, they were all sweating profusely. Sakura's hair had long since fluffed into something resembling a poodle from the humidity. Naruto had considered using the Rasengan as a fan, but that thought was now far from his mind, as he had passed out a few minutes ago. Sasuke was staring at Naruto enviously; wishing he could black out, if only to escape from the heat. The hand that he was flapping in front of his own face did nothing to cool him.

"Stupid, unhelpful hands," Sasuke muttered. "Why can't you be flippers?"

"Gaaaahh," Sakura pointed out.

Sasuke agreed whole-heartedly. He then procured a glass of water from nowhere and tossed it at Naruto's face.

Naruto shook his head vigourously. "Thnnkz, Sskei," he slurred exhaustedly. Sasuke shrugged. "What are we going to do today?" Naruto asked, finally deciding to remove his orange jacket. The black t-shirt underneath stuck to his sweaty skin.

"Oh well, you know, being turned into an iceberg that is currently floating in the Arctic Ocean sounds like fun," Sakura suggested. Unfortunately, none of the three members of Team 7 were magically skilled in such areas.

"There is nothing to do! This is annoying," Naruto itched his nose irritably. "Don't either of you have air conditioning?"

"Yeah, actually I do," began Sasuke. The other two shot up hopefully, but slowly sank down as he continued. "But I didn't really feel like using it today, you know, since it's so hot. Idiot."

Just then, Kakashi waltzed by, wearing his usual long sleeved shirt and thick green vest. Sakura and Naruto's jaws dropped. Sasuke simply mumbled, "You're insane," and raised an eyebrow. Kakashi seemed to spot his students just at that moment, and jumped slightly in mock surprise. He waved to them, and then turned back to the book in his hand. It was unlucky for Kakashi to have turned away at that point in time, because he didn't see Naruto stand up, run towards him, and keep running. Thus, Kakashi was knocked off his feet, landing several metres away on the grass.

Naruto was clutching his face in shock, but not because he had just sent his teacher sailing through the air. "Heeey! Kakashi sensei! Are you crazy? How can you wear those clothes when it's so freaking hot outside!"

Kakashi shot Naruto a very irritated glare. Completely oblivious, the blond genin started running around, yelling about heat stroke and flailing his arms.

"Fine, you want to know how I stay cool on such a day?" Kakashi closed his eyes, snapping his book shut and getting to his feet. Naruto scooted back under the blue shade of the tree, where they all began to nod enthusiastically.

Kakashi shuffled closer to the tree, glancing about suspiciously. "I have a fan!" he whispered dramatically. The three young ninjas were quite unimpressed, so they turned away and continued to complain about the heat. An irked Kakashi grunted and marched down the path; carrying on in the same direction he had been going before Naruto steam-rollered him.

Several seconds later, Sakura saw something large and pale out of the corner of her eye. The big, white thing was moving down the path quickly, after Kakashi sensei. She turned her head to get a better look. It was a giant fan. A folding paper-fan, at that. It also had thin, cylindrical arms and legs. The legs were pumping frantically to catch up to Kakashi, and it was yelling in a high, breezy voice, "Kakashi-sama! Come back! You're the greatest, and I love you!"

As it sped by, a huge wave of cold air swept over Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto. At this, the two boys looked up to see the fan disappearing into the trees. Its cries of "Kakashi-sama!" and "We go together because we're both so cool!" finally faded away. All were lost for words. Naruto coughed.

Finally Sakura said, "Well, this is a Hidden village…"

"Che, like that explains it," Sasuke grumbled.

More silence. A cricket chirped loudly.

"Wanna chase after it?" Naruto asked.

They all shrugged and zoomed down the path into the forest, calling out to the fan.

"WAIT! We NEED your coolness!"

"Don't be so close-minded, Fan! Kakashi isn't the only cool one around here!"

"Uhh…what they said…"

Fin

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(Japanese) "...-sama" is a term used behind the name of one who is greatly respected.

Review, it will be very much appreciated.


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